AUDITIONS - Buzzard Ball (Great Comedy for Senior Actors!)

Merrill Community Arts Center - A Special Collaboration with Passport Stages

Passport Stages offers opportunities for seniors to explore their creative side, whether on stage or behind the curtain, for the purpose of presenting quality live theater.

BUZZARD BALL:  Buzzard Ball by Alexx Stuart is a hilarious play about a not-so-good senior softball team and their wives who put up with them. The dust of the field and the joy of senior moments come to life in this heartwarming story full of laughter and even a few tears.  Picture "Bad News Bears" meets "Grumpy Old Men,” and "The Golden Girls” all mixed together for fun!

Cast Needs:  Director Steve Peterson will be casting twelve adult actors ages 25-80

  • Gramps: The oldest player on the team. Best hitter but runs to the wrong bases. Best fielder but can't throw straight. Gramps is kind-hearted but absent-minded. (age 70-80)
  • Evie: Gramps' marginally less goofy wife.  Her eccentricities include an overly sunny disposition, stunningly gaudy outfits, and a tote bag containing every possible contrivance known to man or kitchen.
  • Sonny Junior Foxx: The mysterious newcomer to the team.  Evie has a carefree attitude combined with sublime confidence.
  • Ginger: Sonny's wife.  Ginger is a levelheaded career woman possessing a slightly skewed view of life.
  • Sarge:  A retired Army lifer who never left the service far behind.  As the only bachelor on the team, he's the target of the Vultures matchmaking wives.
  • Monte  "The Little General" PATTIN: The controlling manager of the team who wants to win at all costs. Not that he has ever won anything.
  • Brandi Pattin-Stratten: Monty’s 20-something, very young 4th wife (trophy wife) whose immaturity, Valley-girl style, and lack of people skills make her a fish out of water in her relationships with the other wives. (age 25-39)
  • Alvina: The hardened owner of Dirty Larry's Saloon.  A no-frills kind of gal, Alvina treats everyone the same -- gruffly.
  • Riley: The Vulture's best all-around player, a man hugely respected for his strength and integrity.
  • Betty: Riley's wife.  A larger-than-life woman and unofficial leader of the clan of Vulture wives; does not suffer fools gladly.
  • Kielbasa: The character of the team.  A bigger-than-life underachiever plagued by a botched retirement and a home life out of Peyton Place.
  • Dorothy: Kielbasa’s meek and mild wife who tries her best not to be noticed.

Scenes alternate between the Baseball Field and Dirty Larry’s Saloon: a run down sports bar.

Audition Dates/Times:

  • Monday, February 27 6:30-9:30 pm
  • Tuesday, February 28 6:30-9:30 pm
  • Callbacks: Wednesday, March 1 6:30-9:30 pm
  • Meet and Greet: Monday, March 6 7:00-10:00 pm

Performance Dates - At Merrill Community Arts Center, Black Box Theatre @ East Ridge High School: 

  • Saturday, April 22 7:00 pm
  • Sunday, April 23, 3:00 pm
  • Wednesday, April 26, 2:00 pm
  • Thursday, April 27 2:00 pm
  • Friday, April 28 7:00 pm
  • Saturday, April 29 7:00 pm
  • Sunday, April 30 3:00 pm

Audition Information:

  • Please sign-up for an audition date HERE
  • Auditions take place at Merrill Community Arts Center 380 Rivertown Dr #200, Woodbury, MN 55125
  • Plan to arrive as able and you will be called into groups to read from selected show sides.  Prepare to stay until the end of the audition time, although you may be dismissed earlier.
  • Bring a completed audition form with you, which is found on the Audition sign-up site linked above.  Include all conflicts with rehearsals on your audition form.  Actors with performance conflicts will not be considered.
  • Please bring a headshot or photo that you do not want returned.  Does not need to be a professional photo.  People will be notified if they are being called back. Not being called back does not mean you are not cast.  Often times, only certain parts need callbacks.  We will let all who audition know the results via email or phone ASAP prior to the Wednesday callbacks.

Rehearsal Information:

  • Rehearsals will take place both at the Merrill Rivertown Campus and the Black Box Theatre at East Ridge High School.  Rehearsals will typically be Monday through Friday evenings from 7:00-10:00 pm.



Contact information

Merrill Community Arts Center
Michelle Witte
Web site

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Monday, February 27
Posted January 30